2014 without any N3 & Hi 2015 on 4th March....

I forgot my password for this blog yet I manage to open it but have nothing to write..

OK BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Akhirnya, berpindah juga selepas 3 tahun 4 bulan setengah..

At last…

I’m moving to another apartment.. (Sewa sahaja, beli tunggulah harga naik sejuta dulu, saya merajuk dgn harga hartanah Bangi (WTH!!!)

Say Good bye to Taman Desa Sentosa indah permai, No Network coverage, neochan mandi bunga pokok dgn daun, ranting2 pokok sekali, binatang2 berkeliaran di jalan & nearby neochan as I don’t think they could climb the 2nd floor which neochan will be parked from now on, the possibility to wake up at 7:30 but still manage to punch at 08:00 (memang tak la), kanak2 depan rumah yg sesuka hati made our gate as their goal net? Well, net never make any annoying sound as gedegang!!! Our gate made from iron which Dickson ate as breakfast.. Wahaha.. GKG.. eh.. & whatever never ending problem which do PM me to know.. =P… and.. Good bye my dear 2 exhousemates.. Sayonara!!

Say Hello to Taman Tropika, extra junction to cross (extra takut bawak neochan), extra traffic light, extra distance to the office, extra traffic jammed which I will definitely make it worst with additional extra “careful” car on the road.. hoho.. Will be some flooding area to cross.. extra money to spend as the fuel will empty faster than before, the rent were > triple, the commuter station is walkable distance as of course possibly make myself go to mid valley or any other super besar mall which can reach by the commuter every weekend (oh yabaii!!!) & any other problem (bumi Malaysia mana tak ditimpa hujan).. and Hello my new 2 housemates.. Hajimemaste!!!

Sekian, berita pindah rumah hari ini.. ^.^”

This is my new rented shared apartment:

Bila Si Dia dah Kahwin..

Alahai tajuk n3..

Bajet frust menonggeng la kot..

Aha, memang tak la sebenarnya..

Tapi ada la sikit. Insomnia seminggu, main candy crush sampai SUBUH, lepas tu mengantuk gila kt office.

Lepas tu, mulalah emo tak tentu pasal kt office kn.

Its does effect actually is, bak kata lagu adik Hafiz, Bahagiamu, Deritaku atau terbalik?

Ada lirik dia terngiang2 di kepala sebab gila karaoke lagu ni 2 malam.

Kau percik api, membakar kenangan lama...

Tinggalkanku, perlahan-lahan ku terima...

Semakin ku sakit, semakin kau bahgia

Mengapakah, aku jadi lemah, sungguh ku tak sangka

Dia membawa jantungku bersamamu.....

(arghhh, pulang balik!!!)

Dah ada balik pun jantung, takde tahap centa sampai tahap apa pun, cuma, tu lah dia, macam percik api, ignite la sehiperbolanya.. Dah lupa, tapi bila dapat berita tiba2 datang balik, memang tak sangka.. Oh, My!!!

Perasaan sebenarnya yg boleh ditaip disini adalah dengki, sakit hati, cemburu dengan kebahagiaan orang lain, sedikit harapan itu musnah walaupun memang dah berhenti berharap pun cumanya, adala harapan jugak kn sebelum ni. So, now, completely, full stop!!

But seriously, its just can't be defined with word. Heartache, it just.. feeling suffocated in your heart, can't breath normally, and tears dropping unknowingly. Maybe, that's how I illustrated. Same in some kind of drama or what.

Wikipedia cakap: Heartache may refer to: Love sickness, condition involving romantic obsession or longing/ A broken heart or heartbreak, emotions after loss, disappointment or relationship break-up.

Google "Sakit Hati" - tak keluar pula definisi apakah. Rasa En wikipedia ni pn, takdela betul. Even not involve romantik2 kejadah pn, sakit hati juga kan, ke tu marah? sakit hati dengan marah tak sama ke? Apa-apalah..

Oh, like pretty please.

Sudah-sudahla ya.. Mengenang yang pergi. Hidup tetap diteruskan. Kerja-kerja masih bergunung ganang menanti. SKT masih di awangan untuk digapai.

Oh, why so serious, get your crayon, get your crayon..

Its May, But I Haven't Post Any Single N3 Yet for 2013? oh, super busy...

Haha...

Busy la sangat..

Sebenarnya penyakit super malas telah menyerang setelah genap 25 tahun.

Oh, semangat yg hilang. Apa Pun Tak Boleh.

meow.. meow.. meow.. meow.. meow..

My family adopted our new sibling, named meow and yes sejenis kucim yg bewarna putih bertompok kelabu yg ntah dari mana mak mengutipnya.

Oh, sejak bila mak & ayah suka kucim?

Don't get it.. I don't like cat. Cat is cute but.. argh.... Whatever..

Meow do take care of Mak & Ayah ye.. Syamir, mak & ayah jaga dia.. Tatmim, err... hati2, jgn jd sup kucim di tgn Tatmim..

Mari pegi meeting.. Meeting = kena marah.

K, Anyeong!!!

Why oppa still being my desktop background?

Oh naui sarang.. Oppa Jang Geun Suk a.k.a Jang Keun Suk a.k.a Prince of Asia a.k.a Geun Suk san a.k.a sukkie.. kyaaa…

Hehe.. my 1st love Korean actor and singer? Oho.. Nampak beno menipunya kn? Mong Ryong (bukan nama sebenar – Sassy Girl) tu siapakah?

Ok.. ok.. Nama sebenarnya Jae Hee, real oppa as dh 30+.. oppa JGS only, few month older.. (oppa jgk ok). Jae Hee was my 1st love for Korean actor.. oh, how I love his character in dat drama.. dan semestinya, bila centa ini… I for sure akn google him n find out drama apa lg he’s in and proses dunload will be starting.. hoho.. tp at dat time.. tenet sgtla tenat n drama dia xbyk sgt.. ade cerita zmn dulu kala…
Honestly, I can’t watch that type of drama.. HK drama, ok, I can stand the story line n etc2 of the zaman dulu kalanya but Korean drama.. mian2.. so, the love feeling towards him kind of so so.. n he’s not singer, never act as idol n I can’t see any kyaaa moment of him.. Therefore, he’s not meant to be.. hoho… same goes to any other crush, such as Lee Jungki, Hyun Bin, Adik Hong Ki, Dong Hae, Kim Hyung Jong, No Min Woo n etc2.. of course typical cool, tall, sombonk, angkuh, proud, full of himself character except adik Hong Ki, character dia, just being himself is adorable already.. kui3.. but this JGS Oppa kind of different.

Why he’s so different? Sebab centa itu buta.. hoho.. ok, mmg x la.. centa towards oppa definitely not a blind love as he’s tall, pretty, cool, handsome even doesn’t have the 6 pack abs or can see vessel arm, I don’t care as perfectly build body for man, I not really interested in that even though my housemate kind of uwaaah for this type of man. I just don’t.. Maybe that explain why I don’t really fall for Kim Hyung Jong anymore as he’s kind of muscle man nowadays.. no need, oppa, just remain tall and skinny.. (too skinny cm skeleton tu reject ok)… n of course dat tiger in Running Man, I don’t really like him.. I suka the ugly Gary (sbb sgt2 peaceful Gary n kind of keep giving surprising)..
Ok, back to the story why oppa still my desktop background? Ok, first reason… I love him.. love love love.. kipas susah mati oppa.. Eels forever evento I don’t like eels but what to do, the fan club named due to the favourite food oppa which give him courage, that slippery eels.. andwae..
1st time falling for him in You’re Beautiful, when he’s smile… as I feel like pausing the drama.. uwaah.. its like love love love in the air.. oppa, how come u being that cute… but. I hate his hairstyle in dat drama and as my n3 regarding the drama, I fall for Jeremy (the 3rd hero) as he so kawaiiiii…. But, I do falling for his voice as he singing lots of ost in the drama.. otokajo.. otokaja.. oho, sgt2 lullaby, I can’t sleep without listening to the song (dulula, see, how parah I am?).. but still the love feeling were so so so.. and then, my ciksu told us bout the new drama, he’s being the lead.. Mary me Mary or Mary Stayed Out All Night. I watch at kbs channel for the start.. 4 ep a week.. but, then its reduced to 2 ep only.. oho, how I’m dying of curiosity of knowing what the ending till I asked my ciksu again to post the dvd of the drama which she’s download. But still why? He’s tall for sure.. slim skinny.. n his smiling.. gagagagaa…. Maybe because of his character always like frowning young man who suddenly, smile.. it’s like.. fuwaaaahh….kawaiiiiii.. melting2… and in the drama, he also singing the ost.. how, I love to listen the hello, hello song.. kyaa… kawaiii.. melting lagi… his long hair, aigoo.. its suit him perfectly. I don’t know why, I really hate curly hair as its kind of girlish n same mcm my real oppa (erk, muntah ijau) n donseng y gomuk itu.. but when its come to this oppa, ok.. everything were fine.. naega, michi, michi baby.. I love his long hair.. oh, jelba, don’t cut it short anymore. Then, the love story begin.. Googleling, dunloading.. n what I found, I already watch him in movie Baby & Me, di Zeccom dolu2.. Dat time, the love still not in the air, sekadar mengisi masa lapang sahaja.. Jatuh centa kt baby itu saje.. hik3.. Then, gila tgk CF oppa, MV n etc2… retgk berkali2.. of course, I’m not having bloody nose o equivalent…unbelievable punya addicted kn?.. Its not, centa y.. I wish, I were his GF o wife o wut.. Just simply a fan who just wanna love him.. love love love.. hehe.. (Psycho la pulak rasanya, abaikan).. orang2 tertentu saje y phm feeling itu.. kekeke…
And, at 2011, ade concert oppa but at dat time, sedeyly to mention.. xdop duit.. thn diri dari menjenguk website concert itu, n when just a few days b4.. alos, tiket, seratus lebey pn ade.. full of regret!!! Ok la, xpe la.. tgk oppa on the screen saje.. Then his new drama this year were love rain (ade n3 synopsis dis drama). Tone of people keep saying.. damn bored drama n include me.. hehe, mian oppa.. but anyway, its not that worst.. its pretty cute.. pretty scenery drama. Come on la, 2 zaman drama, 70s and 2012.. so, for sure, the 70s feeling can’t be digested by most of us.. Whatever, I still love his look the most in the drama. Maybe, because the partner, itu adik yoona too skinny, so, oppa near her, look a bit manly.. boleh? Frens, keep saying he’s too pretty, too girlish. And scene dia dgn yoona, its dat both girl? ---> kata ko!!!! MARAH… hehe.. oppa cool ok. The pretty side of him also cool. Come on lah guys, it’s not a sin to be pretty even more prettier than a girl..
Cakap2 orang. Kutukan orang.. totally being ignored.. haha.. bila la nk fall out of love with oppa ni.. maybe when he’s getting older, of course so do I as we share the same year of 1987.. kan? Oppa… kuiiii3…

Di saat jiwa kosong, menaip n3 menggunakan bahasa y suka hati ko je…but its still better, typing n3, y converting e = 3 n etc2. eg: b3st 5gt... Its annoying ok, stop it, terutamanya, adik2 muda remaja, tiba2..

PS: neomu2.. sarangheyo oppa… ^.^

---> I’m not hentai for sure, its just innocently, purely love of a fan..

Me & Glasses for 12 years

Ok, spectacles to be exact as glasses seem like one of amorphous material – aha, I miss my material physics again.

I’m wearing it since form 1, I guess. It was bout 12 years already. Oho, I’m sound like an old young lady.. (hehe, boleh?)

Being diagnose having difficulty in sighted, it’s totally not a surprising thing as in my family; half of them depend on this to see with clearer view.

Check out this chronology, (suddenly feel like typing this kind of n3 as I just bought a new one – hoho)

I get my first glasses at Rosmadi Optometrist, in front of The Store KB, the yellow building, the one with McD in the same building but currently the building turn to red colour and being a cloth store, I think.. bring back the yellow colour The Store. Huhu..

At first, I just feel like dizzy2. When I read, its some kind of blurry vision. And ask my ayah to get me the spectacles. But I guess, actually the dizziness doesn’t that much but the gedikness to wear one is much more. . Haha.. and guess what, my ayah were anxiously to bring me over some kind of medical expert to get treatment as he worry much bout my health. A child who experience kidney problem at her 8 years old, my parents surely having trouble whenever I complain having some kind of pain. Ok, ayah and mak love my siblings evenly but because the hospitalized nightmare, towards me, they like.. being worried for a little too much..

Ok, then.. optometrist, should I call Dr. for the first, they ask me whether I can’t see far or short distance. And as naïve little 13 years old girl, I just reply. Ermmm.. not surelah. And the Dr ask me whether I can see plat number of a car. And I think I said, yes. Then, based on my symptom, the Dr said, u have problem for short distance. Let’s do the eye check up. The E o u N H and etc2. Then, choose the frame. I guess for the start, my power were just bout +1.00. ok it was +ve!! As it short distance. For the frame, I think I want the frameless one as its some kind of stylo at that time (ok, nak sama dgn Dr Paul). I remember, my favourite character, Dr Paul in medical HK drama wearing one, oho, its super kakkoii. Where are you right now?? Aha. But I still remember, the Dr said; that type easily break down, as a child like u.. ermm.. ok, I’m gonna choose, the dark blue colour with half frame one.
Yatta.. new specs.. new image (konon).. but.. oho.. wearing one doesn’t really comfortable. Yes, I can read more clearer. The headache and dizziness reduce. But.. to have something on your nose, on your ears.. aarghhhh….

After a year plus, I can’t see very well even using the specs. Then, I guess, I need a new one as my friend said, the power of the lens could be increase as you just wear on off. Ok, matta. This time, I’m using my scholarship money (I just get it, yeaa.. – excellent student ok – hoho).. The second one, I bought with my mom at Wakaf Bharu. Forgot the name but the optometrist this time were a lady. Very soft spoken one. Then, the check up begin.. o’oo.. Guess what? The power not +ve but –ve!!.. I think around -1.5 or 2.0.. (not that much)..

Ok, the Dr explain to me that, my problem changing from short distance to far distance. But it supposed be as the one with short distance problem were ahjuma ahjussi.. not, a teenage like me.. (ehe, form 2 or form 3 that time, teenage ok!!!).. then, yeaa… new spec again. Frameless light blue (teenage, can wear it.. forgot bout the tendency to broken down).. lalala…
And matta, I guess.. I wear it whenever I want. Just when I watch HK drama to see the subtitle more clearer.. haha…

Then.. form 4.. enter the MRSM KT – oho, the nightmare of study begin, the tons of homework begin, the miserable life without water begin and also the most memorable school life also begin. As the spec were not always on my nose, I just bring it in my pocket but the baju kurung for prep doesn’t have one. So, after prep, perform the prayer. No pocket, then just put down wherever. and then, there’s a time. Oh, where a you, little glasses. Disappear!!.. ok, maybe I left it somewhere.. hehe.. its not only once happen ok.. and yatta.. found.. but.. (T.T).. the glasses broke down into 2 pieces.. uhuks3.. ok.. balik kampong, buy new one.. new specs.. matta.. yea yea..
This time I buy at Kota Bharu, near the bus station, now the building already gone and turn to Parkson I guess. This time, matta.. frameless.. blue one.. still not wearing it too much..

UTM… Forecast student. MARA already give the money.. so, shopping time.. haha.. ok, I’m not that shopaholic, just buy the necessary (eh???).. and one time, I accompany Cik Norlah to but a new spectales at Focus Point, in Jusco Taman U. o’ooo… there’s promotion. If you buy 2, there will be discount. Oho, after wavering a few minutes (eh???).. yes, I nak jugak. The power this time a bit higher. -2.5 I think.. Andwaee….. this time, half frame. And guess, its super colourful, turquoise with green and black.. otoke, I choose that one at that time. Some kind of regret feeling actually.. so, please don’t wavering and buy anything on a whim.
Matta, even though, can’t see much, still doesn’t were too much as the specs totally not comfy and people some kind, canteknya specs lin. Its feel weird…

Then, I think I went alone to the Taman U or with Cik Zati – stress time, maybe. But, also having trouble with my view. So, decide, buy a new one. I go to the optometrist in front of the Jusco. Eye check up. Oho.. the power increase a bit much. -3.00.. ok, that’s explain why. buy a new one.. frameless, black and white. The glass a bit thick, dai kiraaii.. (cheap lens)…

Ok, this time around, I wear it more obediently as can’t see a way too much without it.

Graduation.. yattaa2….

Working experience begin. Starting to become an adult.
And new image, of course.. hehe..
So, with the salary not that much, I buy a new one at focus point KB Mall. Hoho.. and guess what, the power for this time, reduce.. yatta2… perhaps, by wearing it more obediently and taking lots of vitamin A from carrot.. its surely work. The power this time, -2.50. choose a full frame brown colour. not very long time wearing it, my adik, itu syamir Gomuk, step on it.. warghhh… not broken as it were full frame but the frame kind of.. I can’t wear it.. but. You know, as not having much money and still in hunting job period.. it were despretooo… so, go to the focus point, please repair this, onegaaaiiii…. Ok, done, but still not very ok2.. but wear it laah…

Then.. Nuclear Malaysia. Starting this time, I’m wearing the contact lenses. New Image ok as government officer.. (gehh.. sila batuk)… but.. wearing lens, its really take time and LECEH for super lazy lady like me.. (lady dh)… then, I end up wearing it for just half year. And when I deserted at Langkawi island, end of 2010.. (coordinate a course there)… being totally alone is a big no no for me.. as, I’m gonna wandering alone and will buy anything I’m afford to. Andwae…. Then, ACCIDENTALLY entering the optometrist.. SALE!!!... EYE CHECK UP.. matta.. but the power this time around -1.25 only? I did ask for recheck twice as its like unbelievable (siap gaduh2 manja ngan amoi optometrist tu, aigoo).. ok, accepted. Bought the full frame, red brown one..

Then, starting that point, not really wear it. Just wearing in when I’m driving and really need to. Contact lens, seldomly as the liquid already expired, I throw 1 bottle ok (sangat membazir)..

Then.. wear it bout a year plus.. bored with it already and whenever I’m driving when the sun were hotly shining (agagaga???).. my eyes hurting and I wear the specs with sunglasses to avoid that. Super uncomfortable. Then, there’s a time, I go out on a “date” with cik masz and the mines, then, I found it, a bit cheap specs at A Look Store. So, ok, next month, I’m gonna buy it.

The next month already coming. And that Saturday look forward to buy that specs. But, unexpected things occurred. Sayonara cik masz. As I’m going home but thinking super blank super bored but to go to the mines hitori2, its impossible for me. Then, ok, alamanda. Go to survey a few optometrist store. But I’m ended not buying any as a bit higher price compare with ALook. Then, home… but still, feel like really desperately need it. Then, heading to EconSave. Just a bit unpopular store. And lastly, I end up buying a new one. Bit expensive but whateverlaah. The power this time is -1.5, 0.5 for the silau view. Yeah.. same power for both eyes. Make it easier to buy the lens. Am I gonna wear them again? Here, the list of specs I’ve had in this 12 years.

1) Dark Blue Half Frame
2) Light Blue frameless
3) Blue frameless
4) Turquoise, Green and Black halframe
5) Black and White Frameless
6) Brown full frame
7) Red brown full frame
8) Dark Blue Purple full frame

8 specs within 12 years.. oh?? Super panjang n3.. hehe.. (^.^)

My new specs

My new lens: I only bought grey colour o colourless as grey colour is super fake and colourless just real.. hehe..

When people talk like they were in ur shoes.. Should I say: domo arigatou or just SHUT up!!!

Problems.. Keep gathering, arising, increasing, multiplying..
As aging process take part.. slow slow slowly.. Why it doesn’t decay and vanished? I’m really curioussss..

As positive “me” always say: Dugaan hidup, learning process, ada la hikmahnya tu n blah2… But its kind of.. irritated, when, people said: oh, its dat really can happen? But before this, it’s never happen?
And this me, gonna said: oh, really, that before is when? Itsu? Eonje? Bareba.. but that before, definitely not me right? (MARAHHH)

And regretful to tell the truth is; always, I’m turn to somehow, ungrateful human.
Ok, bumi mana tak ditimpa hujan.. I know it, realize it.. Other people also facing those problems. Those arinaitsuno matters. People also keep asking; why me?.. Oho, how ungrateful.. u’ve given everything already, just please stop asking for more. We have to being thankful for who we are. And yes, it’s doesn’t mean, we have to stop trying to make our life better. It’s surely been ask by religion and also any other view.

When having some kind problematic event, which I try to just running away. But, this not very young lady for sure could not run that much. And of course will dragged back facing those with depress feeling. Wanna die feeling (exaggerate, Istighfar).. uh uh uh.. shaking head..

Actually;I try hard to change it. Try to be cool.. Try not to become angered towards my own self all the time. Annoyed feeling please, just get lost n don’t ever using GPS or wutever equivalent to find ur way back. There’s nothing going to change, even u piercing ur heart hardly (hyperbolically). Sitting down n waiting for good news, it’s really pathetic action to be made, yet, I’m always do that. Menunggu bulan jatuh ke riba. What gonna happen to ur lap? Oh.. It’s the moon… it’s not going to effect ur lap only but whole earth, whole milky way, I guess.. I’m not complaining the Malay idiom as English or Chinese Idiom isn’t exceptional. I just simply typing anything crossing my mind right now..

Oh, people. As my n3 earlier, just don’t claiming u’re empathy or sympathy.. Neither one, I really care. And this mouth always said when having trouble: I give up. People will said: linn, dameyo.. fighting for some more. And me: speechless for a moment. And reply: if u’re me, than, wut u can do? People: errr.. There will always a way of solution or perhaps to make it better. Try to do this, try to do that .. oho, me: u’re not me, all the suggestion .. were… ________________

The conclusion: if u’re not me, just stop giving suggestion which is gonna irritating me more. Ok, just talk whenever I ask. And this me: please don’t ask. Just crack down ur head by ur own.. arghhh..

N3 heartache and brainache.. mental breakdown.. Insomnia for this whole week.. aha.. n 1 of the GP (my participant) ask me to do a medical checkup as I’m showing anemia symptom. Eh???? Colleague said: eh, not even pregnant, yet anemia. Me: I don’t think so, just, I’m stressing over lots of matter.. n yes for sure, I’m not PREGNANT.. oho, please… (-.-“) --> feel some kind of jealous over pregnant women, as their condition will be the reason over lots of thing..

Today: a bit dizzy2, when keep mistaken which floor I have being.. aigoo...
uh uh uh uh (singing I wish by FT Island, Jeremy super kawaiiii)…